As a mum of six, a key lesson I’ve learnt is the importance of resilience in our children. It’s not something that all kids are necessarily born with, but something we can help them learn over time.
Children have their own unique personalities and talents but also their own struggles too. It’s our job as parents to help them develop the ability to face life’s tough moments and with as much resilience as possible.
Resilience isn’t built overnight – it’s something we work on every day. It’s not my responsibility to eliminate their struggles but to walk with them and remind them that strength can grow from challenges.
The earlier said, the better
No-one enjoys a tantrum, and I’ve experienced my fair share. It’s not easy, but teaching kids that things don’t always go our way is an important lesson. (It’s also OK to pick your battles to avoid a public meltdown.
Shape healthy responses
While we can’t shield our children from tough situations, we can definitely give them strategies to cope. We won’t always be there to protect and guide them, so it’s essential for them to learn these life skills for themselves. Whether it’s dealing with a disagreement, losing a sports game or just simply not getting their own way, it’s important how they handle the situation.
Listen, don’t judge
As much as I often want to jump in with a solution, I find it’s better to let my kids confide in me and be a sounding board. I may occasionally have to bite my tongue, particularly with the older ones, but it’s important that they feel they can speak freely without judgement. I can then offer advice gently when the time is right.
Teach good sportsmanship
Even with sporting events, it’s essential they can handle defeat gracefully. Years ago, Matt told me that one of his favourite swimming races was not even one that he won. It was a race where he tried out a new race plan and it rewarded him with a personal best time. In that race, someone else went faster, but it was still a very rewarding outcome for him. It’s a great lesson for the kids to hear that it’s not always about a medal or trophy or, in Matt’s case, a world record, but rather doing your best and taking pride in that effort.
