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Content warning: This article mentions suicide. If you or someone you know has been affected by any of the issues raised in this article, help is always available. Call Lifeline Australia on 13 11 14, or visit their website here. You can also call the Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800, or visit their website here.
It’s a story that has become tragically common among Australian students, and in September 2024, 12-year-old Charlotte O’Brien joined the horrifyingly long line of young people to take their own lives as a result of school bullying.
Charlotte, a Year 7 student at Santa Sabina College in Sydney, experienced years of online and offline abuse, which culminated in her death. Notes left for her family asked them to share her story, tell the school, and raise awareness.
It’s something parents Kelly and Mat O’Brien have done tirelessly since their daughter died, emphasising the need for schools to take complaints and concerns of bullying seriously and alleging this was not the case in Charlotte’s situation.
“I am not after any retribution; it’s not about that. I know I’m dealing with 12-year-old girls here,” Mat told 2GB’s Ben Fordham in the weeks after losing Charlotte.
“I’m looking for the schools to step in and act when things are raised for the first time, not the second time or third time.”
According to the O’Briens, Santa Sabina College has since apologised for events that transpired before and after Charlotte’s death.
The school also sent a letter to their community, which said: “Our teachers and staff continue to prioritise student relationships and wellbeing, working closely together to find ways to better support our students.”
Mum Kelly bravely spoke about her “kind” and “beautiful” daughter who “loved to be loved,” at her funeral, but also said Charlotte “would never want us to be broken”.
Honouring Charlotte’s wish
Instead, Kelly and Mat, who is technically Charlotte’s stepfather, launched a fundraiser for children’s mental health support, which has turned into Charlotte’s Wish.
This new non-profit organisation partners with Kids Helpline to ensure children and families can access help before a crisis becomes overwhelming.
“Her final wish [was] for us to tell her story and that hopefully this would gain some awareness and something positive could possibly come from this,” Mat said.
“I get up every morning and talk to whoever wants to talk to me about it… We need to do better for our kids than we’re doing today.”
This month, that wish has gone one step further. Mat and Kelly met with Federal Education Minister Jason Clare, where they were briefed on the findings of a National Anti-Bullying Rapid Review.
In a huge shake-up to the current system, the review recommends Australian schools must act on a bullying complaint within two days of a reported incident.
It also recommends providing trauma-informed training for teachers, targeted resources to address cyberbullying, and clear guidance to help with early intervention. It will be backed by $10 million in funding to create a national awareness campaign.
“Overall, the report looks good,” Mat told NewsCorp.
“We love the reference to creating ‘active upstanders’ in the report. Charlotte used to say to us that she just ‘needed an upstander, not bystanders’”.
And while it’s too late for Charlotte, Kelly and Mat are happy her legacy could save others.
“We want to extend our thanks to all those involved in confronting what’s become a terrifying epidemic among our children: bullying, and the harm it causes – too often in silence.”
