Then he turned on the sweetness, saying that his wife and baby Donte Jr "are a family that will not be broken".
However, the notice took a turn when he said his new wife was "getting so big".
Revealing how he and his now pregnant wife have been "best friends since before we started dating", he then has the gall to say: "She's getting so big. I miss her being skinny."
And just in case any of his exes felt they'd missed the boat, he wrote: "And to my exes... this could've been you but I'm glad it's not b*****."
The charming guy then ended his allegedly romantic post with: "OMG I cried y'all. We'll get rings soon - chill."
The groom's pals turned the tables, and one of his Facebook friends screenshot his post, slapped emojis on their faces and shared it in the group That's It, I'm Wedding Shaming.
Comments ranged from calling the guy "trash" to "how soon till the annulment?"
"Yo, he misses her skinny! He's about to be missing his head - holy s*** he better run when she sees this," one replied.
"If this post doesn't tell her he only married her to p*** off his ex, I don't know what well. HE WILL LEAVE YOU THE FIRST TIME HIS EX EVEN FARTS IN HIS DIRECTION GIRL," another warned.
"Could you imagine your husband telling you he 'missed you being skinny' as you're carrying his child," a third added incredulously.