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Just two weeks after she revealed she had suffered a miscarriage in an emotional social media post, Em Rusciano has opened up about being accused of exploiting her heartbreak for publicity.
The 38-year-old radio host shared the shocking confession with her co-host Harley Breen when she returned to the airwaves for the first time since losing baby Ray at 13 weeks.
“I had someone come up to me and say I’m milking my miscarriage,” she said live on-air this morning.
“I just buried my son six days ago and I don’t know if I’ll ever get over it.”
“I had a miscarriage and it’s been the most bizarre experience and fortnight of my life,” the mother-of-two continued.
“It’s been a time of questioning all I hold dear.”
Speaking openly about her devastating loss, the former Australian Idol contestant explained she felt “betrayed” by her body.
“It’s deeply personal and it happens inside your body… It’s hard not to blame yourself.”
Fighting back tears Rusciano added: “I’m finding it very painful to talk about it now and I’m, reliving it now. I feel like every time I laugh or have fun I’m betraying his memory
“I found myself Googling, ‘Where do I bury my fetus?’”
On May 20 the 38-year-old media personality took to Facebook to announce that she would be taking “some time off” from her work commitments to grieve.
“About 10 weeks ago I got the most wondrous surprise. I found out I was pregnant,” she wrote to her 250,000 followers.
“I was going to announce it this Monday as we’d hit 13 weeks, but instead I will be at home in the most exquisite pain I can possibly fathom. Yesterday I found out that my little boy, was lost to me.”
“I’d only just seen my baby the week before on the ultrasound, kicking and waving. I’d heard his heart beat and began to imagine what type of person he’d become. What colour hair he’d have, I wondered if he’d be serious like his dad or ridiculous like his mother, or perhaps a little bit of both.
“But now, all I have is that one grainy black and white image, and the rest I will have to imagine. I’m not sure I’m built to withstand this kind of heartbreak, I’m not sure any mother is.
We named him Ray, it was Scotty’s suggestion.”
Rusciano, shares two children, Marchella, 15, and Odette, 10, with her husband Scott Barrow.
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