Which means that all those idiosyncracies you get a break from each day - why does he chew toast like a horse? - will be on full display for the entire holidays.
But that’s just the tip of the iceberg...read on to find out the top 5 ways your husband will have you climbing the walls this Christmas.
Trying to explain the cricket
The summer holidays are synonymous with cricket, and you’ll be hard pressed trying to change the channel. To make matters worse, your husband will inevitably try to ‘include’ you by explaining the intricacies of the game. Before long you’ll be taking notes as he breaks down the difference between silly mid-off and square leg.
Assuring you the leftovers are ‘still good!’
Getting stuck into the Christmas leftovers is a tradition in Australia, but like all good things in life, eventually, they must come to an end. Usually when they start stinking up the fridge and growing their own mini-ecosystems. Cue an adult-sized tantrum from your husband when he realises the two-week-old ham has found a new home in the bin. “Are you serious, it’s still good! I had some yesterday,” he’ll scream as he bolts for the bathroom. Next time just let him at it.
Choosing re-runs over the new stuff on Netflix
Streaming services are planning on people being home for the holidays, and they schedule their new offerings accordingly. Some of the best shows will be dropping over the break, and it’s the perfect time to find your new favourite. Unfortunately, your husband has allocated his holiday time to rewatch The Office. Oh, great, more Michael Scott.
The Half-Assed Holiday Project
Inevitably someone will gift your husband a Bunnings voucher for Chrissy, and he’ll come down with a serious (albeit temporary) case of D-I-Y fever. There will be a grand plan to build something way beyond his skill set - a deck, a cubby house, a pergola! - only to realise halfway through that, it ain’t going to happen. Prepare to stare at that half-built project for the next six months.
Promising to ‘take the kids for a day out’
Sharing is caring, especially when it comes to looking after the kids during the holidays. By this point, you’ve taken them to the beach, braved the Boxing Day sales and helped them spend all their Christmas money. Luckily for you, your husband has promised he’s got a BIG day planned for them, the BEST day ever, you WAIT and see what’s in store.
In fact, he’ll get round to it in a minute, just as soon as he finishes building that bloody pergola.